good art breaks hearts Video (MV)

I haven't woke up yet, I'm sleeping in
I'm getting drunk alone, I lost my friends
They look at me, they say you're f*cked in the head
And you should probably go to bed
But I'm not tired anymore
I woke up in a bed I didn't recognize
I turn my head and I see your deep brown eyes
Every minute of the day feels like I'm living out a blatant lie
But I don't really wanna cry anymore, my tears have dried
I am
Alone in this world
I'm a curious girl
Smoking til I can't breathe
Just wanting someone to see me
But you only wanna see me at night
Don't call me smart, you call me fine
I wanna die, don't wanna be alive now, honey
That doesn't matter, I don't care what comes after this
Just as long as it's over soon
It's a delusion, they're sitting there using you
Till you're dried up and empty inside
When will the pain end?
I wanna get wasted
I'm set on overdrive
Stuck on quarantine in my basement
Baseboards painted a shade of red
Same color that your mama used to dye her hair
Wish I could say I didn't care
I still love you, just can't say it anymore
Writing songs about getting f*cked up
Do you remember when they locked me up
Charged me with under 10 grams
All I wanted was to hold your hand
What I learned in the end was
Alone I sit here, you're always drinking a beer
Smoking so you don't see me
Why do you feel the need to leave?
Stick the needle in, baby you're tweaking
Don't wanna die, I wanna be alive now, honey
That doesn't matter, they don't say what comes after this
Till you're waiting on the other side
It's a delusion, they're sitting there using you
Till you're dried up and empty inside
When will the pain end
Don't wanna get wasted anymore
I'm set on overdrive