when i get the .lowers - Relive Release Lyrics

Silent, still, I knew you were weeping
Didn't know why, and I couldn't get through
To you
I know now you didn't want me to
Years of distance informed by fear
As hope dissolved I came near
And everything I thought was wrong
And the ground you stood on was gone
An accident, but not just incidental
I was angry and bewildered and suicidal
Disappointed, disillusioned, devastated by
Promises eviscerated
I can relive or release
This thing
I can't choose what happened
But I can choose here and now what I'm doing
I know you felt like you were alone
In retrospect I see a friend who abandoned you when you needed help the most
Who shrank away, faded, became a ghost
I know I'm not the picture of reliability
But I was there, held your hand regardless of my needs
Don't know if it's the best or the least I could do
Or if it even mattered to you
I can relive or release
This thing
I can't choose what happened
But I can choose here and now what I'm doing
Not every story has a moral
Not every truth is universal
I have to live mine
But I'm not a captive in my own mind
Not a captive in my own mind
Not every story has a moral
Not every truth is universal
I have to live mine
But I'm not a captive in my own mind
Not a captive in my own mind
I can relive or release
This thing
I can't choose what happened
But I can choose here and now what I'm doing
I can relive or release
This thing
I can't choose what happened
But I can choose here and now what I'm doing