The 3 D's - The Vinegar Man Lyrics

The crazy old Vinegar Man is dead!
He never had missed a day before
But somebody went to his tumble-down shed
By the Haunted House and forced the door
There in the litter of his pungent pans in the murky mess of his mixing place
Deep sticky spiders and empty cans and the same old frown on his sour-old face

Vinegar Vinegar Vinegar Man!
Face us and chase us and catch us if you can!
Pepper for a tongue and pickle for a nose!
Stick a pin in him and vinegar flows!
Well, glare at us, swear at us, catch us if you can!
Ketch-up and chow-chow and Vinegar Man!

Nothing but recipes and worthless junk, greasy old record books of paid and due
Down in the depths of a battered old trunk, a queer, quaint valentine torn in two
Broken hearts and arrows, and silver lace and a prim, dim, ladylike script that said
"With dearest love, from Ellen to Ned!"

Oh, Vinegar man with a sour old face
"Steal-us-and-peel-us-and-drown-us-in-brine!"
"He pickles his heart in a-" valentine
"Vinegar for blood and pepper for a tongue!"
"Stick a pin in him and-" once he was young
"Glare-at-us-swear-at-us-catch-if-you-can!"
"With dearest love" to the Vinegar Man

Musty old record book of profit and loss
Died about Saturday, so they say
And a prim, dim, ladylike script that said "With dearest love, from Ellen to Ned!"

Oh, pepper tongue
Pickles his heart in brine
The Vinegar Man is a long time dead
He died when he tore his valentine