When a man gets lonely
He starts to cry
I've been cryin' so long
That my face ain't dry
My friends are always busy
And my momma won't stop by
Nobody's coming near me
And I know why
'Cause I got hemorrhoids
I got the clap
I got herpes and hep
What'cha think about that?
Baby, every single inch of my pants
Is full of warts (Every inch)
I dress up like a cowboy
Because I can't wear shorts
If you don't want a man
With a green pee-pee
Then you can scoot
Or you could take a peek
At the pus comin' out my boot
At the pus comin' out my boot