Boy-D - Rock Bottom (feat. JBreed The Rebel) Lyrics

So this is rock bottom, the lows of the lows
Where you bury them problems
With nowhere to go
They say it gets better but how should I know
They call this rock bottom
But I call it home
I call it home
Built a home here down among all the gravel
Wound a little tight but I've begun to unravel
Paranoia got me thinkin' I need somethin' to battle
And it seems like doin' right has brought me nothin' but hassle
I feel so insignificant, just don't know what the mission is
I ain't afraid of fallin' but I'm scared to get kicked again
My heart is a stone fortress, so you ain't gettin' in
But pain is a cold sorceress, bitch has bitter winds
Now I'm frozen to the core
Stone face, no way you able to hurt me anymore
Got no faith in the human race
They only love you on the day you hit the morgue
And they're all so fake
You can buy their dinner, you still gotta guard your plate
Predetermine their winners and then they cry out fate
At least the rocks ain't gonna lie to my face
So this is rock bottom, the lows of the lows
Where you bury them problems
With nowhere to go
They say it gets better but how should I know
They call this rock bottom
But I call it home
I call it home
They say it gets better, won't tell me when
Can't explain how much it hurts to hold my pen
It's like I gotta embrace the depression
All the self-hate and aggression
Just to get entrance to places
I don't wanna go to again
Not sure I even got a soul I could spend (which side would want it)
But I'd pay to be alone in my head (sign where the dot is)
But I can't outfight my mind know
Cause I tried it all my life so
Every time I write, I try to make amends
I write these letters but feel like nobody listens
What I remember, this is how I felt in prison
Alone with my thoughts, is a precarious position
So I search for the rocks that I can bury my head in
Cause I'd rather be numb than to feel my feelings
Even though I know how much we both really need this
Trapped inside a dungeon of self-defeated
I know you feel the same, I'm just the one who speaks it
So this is rock bottom, the lows of the lows
Where you bury them problems
With nowhere to go
They say it gets better but how should I know
They call this rock bottom
But I call it home
I call it home
I make mistakes, so I know I'm not perfect
Nothing's given to me, I gotta show that I'm worth it
If I'm not worthy, then skeletons rise to the surface
Destined to be a king, but yet I'm living like a servant
Rock bottom was shattered pieces of bourbon
And empty pill bottles and with my blood slowly dripping from the curtains
So much pain in my eyes, can't see the same person
Body getting colder as the symptoms slowly worsen
Told my friends I'm not okay, but phone was drier than my cough
Didn't know what my fam would say, I'd probably piss them off
Started drifting off, and I took it as a loss
And I tried to pinpoint the exact moment that I lost
Won't accept help, but dark days becoming often
Get treatment for myself or this gurney will be a coffin
Gotta do it now, cause there's no later option
Or my ashes on a shelf, cause I hit rock bottom
So this is rock bottom, the lows of the lows
Where you bury them problems
With nowhere to go
They say it gets better but how should I know
They call this rock bottom
But I call it home
I call it home