Chandler Joshua - My Dear Melancholy Lyrics

An absence of joy
That debilitates and binds
I'm not suicidal
I just hate being alive
As existing becomes exhausting
And it's work just to breathe
I'm constantly wondering
Why must this happen to me
Can't find a reason
I suffer as I do
But I'm still stuck here
Unbeknownst to you

My dear melancholy
Just killing me softly
Everywhere I go
You always take control
Know all the strings to pull
On me

None know my plight
As my scars don't show
Since I'm not transparent
I'll never let you know
I see that I'm damaged
And I need to be cured
But I'm just too scared
To let my thoughts be heard
An indescribable weight
That sits on my chest
As long as I have life
I'll just be a wreck

My dear melancholy
Just killing me softly
Everywhere I go
You always take control
Know all the strings to pull
On me

I try to shut you out
But you're imbedded in my being
It's why any who know me
Know that I'll be leaving
For I can't bear to stay
And risk them seeing my scars
Too many for any to handle
So till I flee I'll remain afar
Relationships built on sand
That will stand till the tide
But that's all I need
'Cause it's easier than goodbye
Goodbye

My dear melancholy
Just killing me softly
Everywhere I go
You always take control
Know all the strings to pull
You always take control
Of me
My dear melancholy