Chris Tendie - Dad AF Lyrics

I'm on my middle-aged white guy shit
I might not have a lot of swagger but f*ck I got that drip
Yeah, I make that face when I catch your eye on the street
But I don't want beef 'cause my doctor said I should stay away from red meat
I don't wear Gucci
I don't rock Prada
But knee-high socks, now that I got a lot of
I don't wear Louis,
But you know I rock the polo
I can't afford a Rolley that's why I take advantage of these BOGOs
I'm gonna destroy you like a teepee while I sit back and relax in my tighty whiteys.
Put the Rolls Royce away cause I'mma step out the car
When I get on the green, I'm gonna be five under par
I'mma outsmart all you little upstarts
Put the pedal to the medal this ain't no pull start
Stop your heart with these bars while I'm ridin' away in my state-of-the-art golf cart
When you buy your drugs, your whole wallet's on deck
But when I buy my prescriptions, I use my dividend checks
I'm so dad as f*ck that I wish I had a candle
That got my entire house smellin' like socks and sandals
My taxes always big trouble, shout out to CPA Randal
He got upset when a business expense was 20 bucks to yankee candle
My summer style's good too, my wardrobe never seems to lack
'Cause when I cash in all my bonds, I'm blowin' stacks at the gap
I might not have the gold like Midas, but I got this sweet Vette from my midlife crisis
But just to clarify I do have gold as an investment
I understated its weight for a better tax assessment
I like sittin' in my living room with my herbal tea
Watchin' NASCAR, I ain't watchin' no Grand Prix
Bought a new stereo it be soundin' fine
Pop in the vinyl of Sweet Caroline
Oh, Neil Diamond to old? if that's what you say
I'll bust out my Zune and blare Sugar Ray
I'm catchin' all this flak 'cause I castle the racks up in the fanny pack
You better shut the f*ck up or you gonna catch this clap back
Looks like you guys are all out of sorts, 'cause I'm lookin' down at you like, 'Oh, hey there sport!'