You're lying on lavender
In a senseless dream
I put your death on the calendar
Write to you every week
I try to just talk to you
But you don't talk back
I tried to cover up my bruise
From when your dad got mad
And I've been thinking about the ether
And how it would kindly take us from here
And your wondering if you'll change
Another day - yay
Now you're lying there awake
Wondering if you could take more
But these days are impossible
To just be
I want to give up this world
And just live in the dirt
And let the soil soak into my shoes
When being swallowed by the Earth
I'm not what I seem on the surface
When I say I'm giving up the dole
Dying on purpose
Washed up cold on the government's loans
All these kids have been singing
"We've learnt all the truth"
And I said what do ya mean?
"We've been learning it at school"
And I said what the f*ck are they teaching you that for?
Those were imperialist and that's who we are after
And I've been dreaming about the demons
Then I dream about all these socialistas
And then truth becomes less clear
We don't really have to leave here
When there's love and truth to seek
Now I am walking
The trees are talking
The room isn't always still
The floor's like a treadmill
My hands don't seem to think
My toes too numb to step
My head don't seem to fit
I guess I gotta get a grip of this misery
So I can be
More kinda certain with what I wanna do with my life
Oh I wish I could just stay true to my wife
So don't reach for that razorblade
Or I will jump from the highest place
My mind is not one
It's all, that's all of you