Envyus - The Note Lyrics

I ain't really think that my life would reach this point
Sitting in my car contemplating death by knife point
Lemme lay it out for y'all
Right now I'm in my car and these are my last thoughts
Before I get trapped in a box
Before y'all forget me
I hope y'all forgive me
I been feeling just so empty
Except for the anger, the sadness, the envy
All that I got within me
Hold on
I'm pulling off right now
I'm in the car and I'm bout to hit sixty
I got these pills that gon' make me real dizzy
I got this drink that's gon' make me real tipsy
But we ain't there yet
I'mma drive a little bit and write before I end it
I'mma let you know right before I'm gonna end it
So don't worry just listen
So don't worry just listen

It's getting hard to see I got tears in my vision
I got people around me that listen
I got people that tell me I'm gifted
But that shit don't keep me lifted
I been tryna find out why I'm living
Sadness is honestly one big prison
I can't pinpoint one big instance where it started at
I don't even think that my hearts intact
In fact I feel like an insomniac
I don't eat, don't sleep come and find me at
The place where no time is at
I don't think I'mma see the light in fact
It's kinda whack
Death feeling pretty anti climatic
I ain't ever learn how to drive stick
I'm bout to die in this automatic
I'm bout to die all alone and shit
The pills kicking in, I feel the drink coming in
The chances of living are pretty slim
But I ain't finished yet

I can't read the speedometer no more
Last I checked it was like 844
I should've at least ate before I went out like this
I hear sirens I hear crying I'm near dying, wow
I'm sort of at peace I'm sort of stressed
Visions on the street I keep seeing death
He's just waiting to stomp on my neck
Once I crash and forget about the rest
I wonder if I'll finally rest for a whole night
Without nightmares without night terrors
Are there really divine stairs
In heaven am I gonna find stares
Will I find angels
Will I find angles
To see my problems vividly
To see where I f*cked up differently

I flipped the car and I crushed my arm
And I think my rib's f*cking stabbing my heart
Wait, the pain is gone
He's coming now
His hood is high, his arms are long
He's reaching out and he's singing a song
And he wants me to sing along
It's like a lullaby
For the lost
When we finally die
It's strange
I can finally smile
I can finally smile
Death ain't ugly
Just know that he's old
He's like a gentleman right out the mold
He's got a tux on under the robe
I blink
And I see the road
I don't know where it goes
But I go