It's been many years of thinking
If only I was Mr. right, You would have came out that night
I told you I loved you, I told you I need you
I ran away that day
Felt so betrayed, Full of hate
Why couldn't I be the one you wanted to age with?
"Don't worry about it" said Adrian
You were her best patron
Many men wanted you but I wanted you for you
Wanted to make your dreams come true
You would have been a dream come true
I feel like Gerald and you were my Gina
Now I'm stuck with Zelda
In my dreams I can't even have you
Haunted as if I did something, To f*ck it all up
Was it because I didn't love you enough?
Or did I love you too much?
Was it because I treated you too much like a women of interest?
When you only wanted to be friends, I said I'm sorry made amends
You said you cared for me but it was all pretend
Because if you did you would have not left me on read
You would been here with me instead
Not as my lover, But as my f*cken friend
Now when I think of you I feel nothing but dread
I could never be enough for you
Now I'm nothing to you
And you found him
And he makes me insecure, He's so down to earth, His friends say "word"
He so perfect and your so perfect
Both of you are so perfect
And I wish I was perfect, I wish I was him
Many times I'm so f*cken grim
I hate myself and I can't pretend
You just looked like you had the answer to live
And I found in you what I lost as a kid
It was joy
This is your song
And I thank you for what you gave me
And I hate you for what you made me
And I hate you for what you meant to me
Made me forget my pain but to you, I was too insane
So I stayed in my lane because I'm not an angel like you
Remember going to your house, We would just be hanging around
You didn't seem bothered
No one was home not even your mother
Anyone would have mistaken me for your lover
But we just spoke over a bowl of mint chip ice cream
Now inside I scream
I lost you my friend, My beloved friend
You know these songs are of you
The angel of my stories
Goodnight and all good morning texts that we would send the next day
But that was 5 years ago almost 6
Devil in me fell for the angel in you and no we never had sex
But some how I feel a deep connection to you
So why do you torture me?
Why do you still talk to me?
If you don't wanna see me
Then why do you act like you miss me?
You told me you did then you just dipped
You have him, yet still rope me in and then vanish
Why do you leave me all damaged
Yeah
Why do you leave me all damaged
Yeah
Why do you leave me all damaged