Greyscale - The Deep End (Demo) Lyrics

I've been thinking 'bout a lot of things; firstly
How'd I drink so much but feel thirsty?
Think it's my body wanting more
So I stumble to the door of my empty fridge with no lights on
Been a mess since the last time you came around
Time you left in the middle of that nasty row
Over who he was and where you've been
But I've no time for thinking about reasons now

Because I'm lost in the deep end now
Sink or swim but I don't know how
I still got a lot to figure out but
It's all going up in flames

For the last few months it's been back to basics
I'm lost in stasis, a B-side bloke
And no one wants to chat to me, just turn their back on me
Cos I've forgotten all the inside jokes
I'm going for broke before it's too late
Everyday another way to change my mind-state
Buying into some new mantra to depend on
But sometimes self-help can become its own end so

I guess I'm lost in the deep end now
Sink or swim but I don't know how
I still got a lot to figure out but
It's all going up in flames

I've been thinking 'bout a lot of things, like the
Fact that I will never be the type of guy to
Make a girl swoon, across the room, heart beating fast
Acknowledging at last the other guys in college
Are nothing compared to you- who? Whom? What is the deal?
So you're some unique intellectual who's keeping it real
Try to use all of the spectacle that's making her feel
So blind-sided, unguided in this cinema reel
But really- what's the crux? The crux of your pitch
Cos see the art of catching feelings is like scratching an itch
Reciprocation of your recreation key to the sitch,
And it's simpler if you're smart, good-looking or rich
Or if you're relevant- unfortunately I'm none of those things
Just a faulty mix of flaws with a topping of cringe
Whether food or fags or alcohol I'm liable to binge
I'm watching snap maps, tapping into life at the fringe
If I could help it, that werent really the life that I ran
Sat in my room with my guitar singing with Matty and Van
It barely mattered, so long as I just do what I can,
So I hurt, and play guitar, and then I cried when I sang
Along to bopping tunes and musicals and slow ballads
And the Smiths when I felt the world was being so callous
Browsing indie lists on Spotify til dead hours
Done with common courtesy and your absurd manner but yeah

I guess I'm lost in the deep end now
Sink or swim but I don't know how
I still got a lot to figure out but
It's all going up in flames