Guardians of the Slow Lane - Rubbish at Girls Lyrics

He mumbles and stutters
He can't look her in the eye
He knows he's heading nowhere fast
But he's gonna have a try
In his head, he's played it through
A hundred thousand times
But when he plays it out for real
It's a hundred thousand pantomimes

Cause he's so rubbish at girls
Maybe it's those lovely lips
And oh-so bouncy curls
That gets him into such a state
The embarrassment that life creates
Will make him blush for his latest crush
His legs to jelly, his brains to mush
But he really just can't help it
Because he's just so rubbish at girls

With the lads it's easy
He's bold, he's brave, he's brash
But when it comes to the opposite sex
He's heading for a crash
He whoops and whistles with the best of 'em
But when he's by himself
His confidence deserts him
And he's left upon the shelf

Cause he's so rubbish at girls
Maybe it's those lovely lips
And oh-so bouncy curls
That gets him into such a state
The embarrassment that life creates
Will make him blush for his latest crush
His legs to jelly, his brains to mush
But he really just can't help it
Because he's just so rubbish at girls

Cause he's so rubbish at girls
Maybe it's those lovely lips
And oh-so bouncy curls
That gets him into such a state
The embarrassment that life creates
Will make him blush for his latest crush
His legs to jelly, his brains to mush
But he really just can't help it
Because he's just so rubbish at girls