Justin C Ward - No Such Thing Lyrics

I only went inside to get out of the rain
But the barman said how good it was to see me back again
Look at all the labels there's green, blue or plain
I wonder what there is to take the edge off the pain
He must have mixed them all, from a mint julep to a singapore sling
And a better way to heaven, I wish I'd never heard of such a thing

Called the dealer up to find a different way to feel
Now half of me's not here and the rest of me's not real
As I left the premises he made this appeal
Don't operate machinery or drive an automobile
He's always got a bag for you it's really gonna make you swing
And a better way to heaven, I wish I'd never heard of such a thing

I told this priest I thought I'd never have to come to you
I 've never-been a believer, but I've heard it's good to do
If you turn up every week and hang out with the crew
They've got a holy hotline and they're gonna put you through
He gave me a blessing, he said now you're gonna hear the angels sing
And a better way to heaven, I wish I'd never heard of such a thing

I went back to my lover, for someone to tell the tale
She was so pleased to see me, she forgot to inhale
When she came round, she was looking very pale
She said that's all she needed, like a child in jail
Where did you get to baby, I've been waiting for you since the spring
And a better way to heaven, I wish I'd never heard of such a thing

So I went back to the bar, it kind of hard to explain
The barman said how good it was to see me back again
I looked at all the labels, there was grape, there was grain
I don't know what they've got; to take-away the pain
I must have tried 'em all, from grappa to a grapefruit sting