The devil guided my hand as I slammed the shiv through scripture
Selling my soul to sin, and this liver to liquor
They painted me to be a monster so I brushed the horns bigger
Finding pleasure in pestilence, index locked on the trigger
If it's my life or yours? well, you get the picture
My mother's a saint, but gave birth to a sinner
I heard the serpent slither, saw the unholy figure
And I'd relinquish my soul to sixes just to see seven figures
See, Tim was such a nice boy, but then he got bigger
Now he's addicted to cash flow, treats women like strippers
See my momma raised me better, but rules could have been stricter
My pops worked through the night just to provide us with dinner
80 hours a week? is the working man a sucker
Some dope, and a glock could stack that guap motherf*cker
But evading the law's like gambling stocks motherf*cker
I've weighed all my options, I'm still lost motherf*cker
I'm sick of the strain, the struggle the pain, and my choice is these pills, or self medicate
I got no way to relate, no way to escape, then I relapse and I hate me for all that I drank
I'm prolonging the suffering, I cant get it straight, I'm back in the cycle, Emotionally drained
I'm here praying for strength, but still contemplate if that loaded tres eight could relieve me today
I see your heads in the clouds son, but mines in the crypt
I'm drinking hemlock with Socrates, I was born with a deathwish
An educated mind with disconnected synapses
A chemical imbalance leaves me longing my absence
I find bliss in the anguish though it may appear tragic
Knowing battle scarred hands can find peace everlasting
It's me, myself, my mind, the titans that been clashing
Kicking back a fifth of beam so my limbs can get to sagging
Skip the fractions or rations, the bottles for relaxing
Full throttle with my habits while my demons steady laughing
I've been pissed on, and pissed off, cuz I'm just a f*cking addict
I'm not begging for help, I just need to gain some traction
Whether it's classes, rap, or trapping I just need to get it cracking
Cuz I'm sick of walking down this path that's simply lacking passion
But I'm pushing my pen, and my pad at my craft so count me back in
Know that Kovacs is here to stay, go ahead and cue the brass in
I'm sick of the strain, the struggle the pain, and my choice is these pills, or self medicate
I got no way to relate, no way to escape, then I relapse and I hate me for all that I drank
I'm prolonging the suffering, I cant get it straight, I'm back in the cycle, Emotionally drained
I'm here praying for strength, but still contemplate if that loaded tres eight could relieve me today
(I'm prolonging the suffering, I cant get it straight, I'm back in the cycle, Emotionally drained
I'm here praying for strength, but still contemplate if that loaded tres eight could relieve me today)