The Lonely Island - Saturday Night Lyrics

Hey what's up, man?
Nothin.
You'll never guess what happened. Check it: last Saturday, my main chicken was like,
"You need to take me out for a bubble bath, oil massage, and candlelight dinner! "
Oh, oh hell nah!
That's what I was sayin, I had to tell her like this:

Saturday night is not for romance
You've got all week to get into girls' pants
Got ladies in the UK and ladies in France
But Saturday night I'm in my B-Boy Stance

Now...
Saturday night is the night after Friday
I'm thinkin bout fly-ass girls out on the highway
I push my 'celerator and beep my horn
It's not a night for dancing, a night for porn
Jerkin in the bathroom then coolin with my fellas
I'm duckin these broads like rain to umbrellas
Saturday night ain't time for the chicks
It's time for the fellas to watch porno flicks
I'm pokin through, I hope no one can tell
I'll go in the bathroom, ring my own bell
Ring the alarm, but I'm not The Fu-Schnickens
It's Saturday night and I'm dodgin these chickens
Wake up on Sunday, taste dude in my mouth
Monday back home, the chick's in the house
Tuesday now I'm back with my girl
Never let her know about my Saturday world
Ah...

Saturday night is not for romance
You've got all week to get into girls' pants
Got ladies in the UK and ladies in France
But Saturday night I'm in my B-Boy Stance

Chillin with the girls can be pretty cool
But kickin it with the fellas is a different world
A girl can never understand what it's like to be me
I stand up while they sit to go pee
Well it's guys' night out and I'm feelin real horny
Roll to the store for a case of forties
Inhibitions go straight out the window
Let's explore our bodies and smoke some endo
I'd rather watch tv and drink my Jack
Than spend my whole Saturday on hittin from the back
Sure it's all good to get your snuggle on
But I'm a dude for all dudes and my word is bond
Yeah his word is bond like the powder for your testes
I'm sweet on my boys like a melted bar of Nestlй
I'm down for my dudes and it's more than male bonding
Our fingers in the ass and men are responding
Well...

Saturday night is not for romance
You've got all week to get into girls' pants
Got ladies in the UK and ladies in France
But Saturday night I'm in my B-Boy Stance

Even though guys are better to bang
Girls stay nice like Michael Chang
Michael Chang don't win a lotta Grand Slams
But his attitude is good so he's the man
When we rhyme about tennis you know we'll always be drunk
My man Michael Chang's got legs like a tree trunk
Michael Chang, he's down with us
We've never hung out but we like him a lot
Even though he looks young, on the tour he's a veteran
A genuine role model Asian American
C to the H to the A-N-G
Everyone looks tall from his POV
He may not know the feeling of victory
But he's got a lotta H-E-A-R-T
We've never met Chang, and that's alright
He can still sleep over on a Saturday night
Sat-sat-sat-sat

Saturday night is not for romance
It's a day for us to get into dudes' pants
Whether it be Kirk, Michael Chang, or Lance
Saturday night I'm in my B-Boy Stance
I'm in my b-boys' pants
(I love these pants)