2022, I fell out with my brother
And going through changes with my lover
I got trauma from me fighting with my mother
Told her to go be with them
I aint got no other (mother)
Got depression in me, they don't get it though
I be over smoking, never overdosing
150 mg, I tell her up the dosage SSRI in my body, not a Moltrin
I was tripping over water quality Know that im at risk, they gotta' keep an eye on me
Asking me if I could do it, say probably
Got a drug problem, I can't do sobriety
22 of July and September
Got out the PRATT, surrounded by the members
Hate that I even remember
It's every day that I'm pushing through
They telling me it get better, can't see the proof
Can't make sense of it, I need a visual
From my perspective, we two different individuals
They don't even know the kind of weight I carry on me
I be fussing and crying & carrying on
The battle ain't over, know I gotta carry more
Inside of me, blow up like a claymore
The love that I get, versus the love that I give
Everybody know I go the furthest extent
I done did some shit tryna make up for it
That's why I try to live perfect
I done lost the other half of my puzzle piece
I feel I'm no longer a fit
Beating myself up to this day I did some shit she can never forget
I know when I fall again I'll need some help up
They don't understand it's hard to call out for help
It's like holding hands while walking into hell
Shit, I don't know about nobody else, yeah
But this shit been hard for me
I'm a soldier like I come from the army
Moving on, it's gonna harm me
Does she even have, the thought of me?
I need to vent
In the Honda, but I drive it like a Fin
Acceleration, I push against the wind
Fighting depression, don't know if I'ma win
Can't leave the ring, I'm already in
It's gonna get better, nigga don't know when