Leon Mondschein - Kapabel (Christmas Edition) Lyrics

[Verse 1]
Cold December lights flicker through my window
Mom's calling again, I let it ring and ring
These pills on my nightstand tell their own story
Of capability slipping through my fingers like snow

[Pre-Chorus]
They say "Come home for Christmas, be yourself"
But which version of me should I bring?
The one they remember or what I've become?
In this synthetic glow, I'm barely holding on

[Chorus]
I'm still kapabel, kapabel
Though my hands shake with the weight of their dreams
I'm still kapabel, kapabel
But not the way they want me to be
This Christmas feels like static in my brain
Dancing through memories I can't explain

[Verse 2]
Hamburg winters taught me how to fade
Into shadows of who I used to be
Now these fairy lights mock my trembling
While relatives whisper "He's changed, can't you see?"

[Bridge]
Silent night, holy f*ck, I'm so tired
Of wearing masks at dinner tables
Playing roles in their perfect picture
When my synapses are unstable

[Chorus]
I'm still kapabel, kapabel
Though my hands shake with the weight of their dreams
I'm still kapabel, kapabel
But not the way they want me to be
This Christmas feels like static in my brain
Dancing through memories I can't explain

[Outro]
The tree lights blur like stars tonight
As I drift between who I was and who I am
Still kapabel, just differently divine
In this cold December machine, I stand