Absence Video (MV)

I feel there is always something inside us
The slight absence of being
That reminds us who, what, and where we are
And where we are going
Every day one must choose what to do
With what is craving inside
Braving the weather of the spirit

I often choose to fill my absence
With liquor
With laughter
With friends
With women
With noise
Buzzing music blazing from the war drum
That can concuss the very core of me
And then for a few hours every day
I forget
I pass away into the abyss of bliss
A valley of chuckles, waltzes, and bad choices
Until I wake
The beer has drained
The laughter flown away
The friends driven home
The woman's warmth fled from the sheets
The noise faded deep into the distance

There is only me and the silence

The center of me a tiny bit lighter
The absence of me has grown slightly wider
One shovel of earth at a time
I am closer to transparency
A grave, stony look in my eye
With ash having filled in my chest and breathe
For I know where this is leading
I've been planning in secret for 25 years
This heist
This grand escape
That I've successfully kept from even myself
Until the sudden pang bites in the center of absence
A dart, fiery and loud begs the question
"How long have you been gone?
If you turn around now will you ever make it home?
Or is this where you stay?"

Before I decide I'll stop by the mini mart
Grab some wine
Call the guys
To reel in overhung glory

Maybe I'll feel better in the morning
Maybe I'll feel better