I'm awake Video (MV)

When I was eight, there was this boy who used to hate me
And he'd always call me names, so I tried to change
When I was fifteen, I made myself believe that girls like her could never be
In love with me

When I was young, I thought I had a clue,
Had to prove myself and all I knew
To everyone that passed me by, so afraid of wasting time
I'd like to think I might have changed
But I've just remained the same

So if I don't feel like myself, or I haven't dealt with what that means
And still I'm not compelled to get over myself
I won't forget
That there's more to life than things that haven't even happened yet

When I was young, I'd always fantasise
Look up and hope to see blue skies
Just to ease me of the strain, but I was always met with rain
I've still not lost that stressy head
I've still not made my f*cking bed

So if you're looking for an answer, and you think I can provide
Just know I might not find, cos I'm over taking signs
And I'll return unafraid
Stood aboard my barricade
Of things I'll find and bones I'll break
All these gifts disguised as my mistakes
Finally, I'm able to say
I'm awake

I'm out of words to say, for the better
It's been a pleasure, but I'm not complete forever
So this has lifted off some pressure
I can't just drive away, and do it all again, but better
I gotta walk this one forever
No matter what we've got to weather

Cos if there's one thing that I know to be true
Whatever's coming next, whatever's passing through
If it's joy or if it's pain
Let it go or let it stay
Cos at least I get to see, it become everything it's ought to be

So if you're looking for an answer, and you think I can provide
I know I might not find, but I'll at least give it a try
And I'll return unafraid
Stood aboard my barricade
Of things I'll find and bones I'll break
All these gifts disguised as my mistakes
Cos finally, I'm able to say
I'm awake