I almost offed myself at fourteen
Ready to do it, ready to lose it, but fled the scene
Took my moms pills prescribed
To cause her son's death tonight
Couldn't decide between living and drowning at the same time
Or take the easy way to save time
I looked in that damn mirror
Saw a worthless weak sack of shit, a f*cking error
A mistake in human form, worth nothing to no one
Became cold and far gone from reality
Couldn't do anything other than sleep and cry another sea
It was so clear to see, I wasn't feeling happy
Unbeknownst to my knowledge
Nobody would do a thing about it
I wasn't worth the f*cking time it takes to hear my voice
So tired of being less than a second choice
So I popped the cap off to stop the noise
But I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
I heard that front door
But I heard the front door, my mom came home
And what she saw, was nothing
I was in the bathroom and what I saw was my moms sorrow at its worst
Spilling the sadness, passing the curse
That was the last thing I wanted
Bursting the only person who ever gave two f*ck about me
Destroying a broken home, on the count of three
Or stay home and hold the sadness for the rest of your eternity
I sneaked the pills back, feared if they would react
They didn't hear a word, couldn't see it was pitch black
Imma hold my sorrow so they can get their life on track
The worst parts are unheard or pushed back
Now this a fact, that I've been holding on, for so long
Cause I didn't need those loved ones, to get a hold on, what was going on
On that bathroom, on that day
It's not the right time nor the right place, so I just
Do as I do, bottle up and seem cool
At least enough for them to not realize
I almost tried, to take my own life, And how I feel inside
Signs that makes me scared of myself
I wasn't scared until this day was dealt
I know now I can't let this be felt
And with this album done, I can leave it all as quotes and just walk
And hope to god I don't hit the wrong notes