Mommy Pants - Even Though I'm 42 Lyrics

Mommy, where did you go last night
You tucked me in real tight
But I never fell fast asleep
I looked into our living room
You were putting your shoes on your feet
Then started to add your makeup
Were you trying to get back before I wake up

Did you have fun, you got back at one
You left at ten, so I know it was not 7-11
Why do you need another guy
I'm right here, though I cannot purchase beer
But you can, and we can watch movies past ten
I'll rub your hair, show you somebody can care
You don't need no guy
Too many are a walking lie
I know you better than you know the dance floor
They just want you to be their whore
I just want you to be Mommy
Is that too hard to see...Mommy

And if you need to ejaculate
I will leave the room
I respect you have to masturbate
With your fingers, hairbrush handle or broom
Just think of the perfect archetype
And know you'll never find him at night
During the day if he asks you to dinner
Say what about a breakfast date ya sinner

Mommy you mean the world to me
Don't let them take advantage
I want you to be quite free
For me, but also be truly happy

By the way mommy
If you buy a race car bed online, it ships fast, because it's a race car bed