Ms - So Close Yet So Far Lyrics

I really don't know how to process
My emotions take over and it's a vest
Filling the weight of my chest
Something i'll be feeling next
I dont get why im feeling this way
Using the vest to hold my heart in
Loving is a whole different compartment
Something where i couldnt touch it
Only reached once by a girl
It was so dark yet i felt alive
Oh my god she took my heart
And i turned to a freedive
Bottled up emotions
Took a new high (damn)
Too much to process,
They give me too much problems
I don't wanna lie
But i had to save her life
So i had to die
Emotionally i've never felt alive (what)
This aint corny just seen shit
It's been immortalised
Its morals being built up on deaths
She wouldn't get
Cause she aint seen one death (what)
Bunch a cap, lying is apart of the process
I'm so close yet
I'm so far
I'm close with yall who's in it?
Enemies pack in it
Who's side yall in yet
Fore i bat out some disses
Don't get it twisted im deadly with it
I don't use guns i like stabbing my victims
While yall turn away
I'll clean up and dig yall graves
To yall who take any sides
To yall who think they real
No women yous a fake
To yall when i tap my drac
To yall who just here to take
To yall who out for blood
Something i don't like turn and run
To yall who tried to stay
I gave my life to stay
I gave my life to stay
Ive done 15 suicides
Something that god would let slide
How selfish can you be
Making your family living with grief
How can you sit here and just be
She is lying, what for?
I don't need no henny to see
Something you wanted to be
But cant get yet, so
What was you meant to be
Mummy raised a failure
Bet daddy wouldn't like a naming
What i didn't do dat
What type of man dissing another mans son
That'll be me
I couldn't be giving anything out for three
If you paid for one then oh maybe
How can you leave and still see some greed
You fake wait and see
Missing out on me like
Thanks baby
Man shut yo dumbass up
Snort your lines and hit that md
I dont respect people like you
I keep it a hundo
I stay like a huncho
Run with my gun tho
Knives still the first run tho
Planned a whole lot tho
But it only took one month
So what was you planning to be?
What was you planning to be?
So what was you planning to be?
What was you planning to be?
I mean one day at a time i guess
So some will wait and see
I aint waiting cause i aint mess wit you
Cause i'm turning to a private mc
What was you planning to be?
Gotta be something worth energy
What was you planning to be?
Career planned or some fein
What was you meant to be?
A escort, stuck out in a club
What were you planning to be?
An apprentice hoping to make dad happy
What did you turn out like
Drugged out pike
Hopping her drink is spiked
Rape, no way just a lie
So tell me
What was you planning to be?