Phero Hill - XXVI (feat. J-Rican) Lyrics

Look, everybody been askin' me, what the f*ck I been up to
Shit, this is it
And they tellin' me I'm getting' too old for this shit
But this all I got
It's time to grow up, right

I been, spending all my time
Tryna understand myself
Never been so alone but ain't never been the kind of motherf*cker who would ask for help
I'd amount my worth
Through the value of the fame and the wealth
But results are the same, always sulking in shame
All the pain would explain my health
As I walk along this threshold with no guiding line
On a search for some purpose but I can't imagine me finding mine
Is that, simply a fallacy from the fact that all my faith is low
And my girl sayin' you're meant for this but its hard for me to embrace it though
Cause I'm, twenty six
No job, no pay, no benefits
No accolades, no co-signs
I been neglecting the evidence
So I'm over here believing its all 'cause of me and my lack of will
But I'll keep writing this fiction even if the failing in fact is real
'Cause it goes beyond myself
I'll speak for those who ain't spoken for
I'm holding on to this broken sword
As I push the bounds 'til I open doors
I been so ignored and I'm sick of everyone drawing up who I'm supposed to be
So f*ck keepin' it silent now it's time that all of y'all notice me, what's good

It's been a few years, I'm in my mid twenties
And I haven't got my dreams
But I'ma keep goin', even if y'all don't see it
'Til things become reality, yeah
(Twenty six, twenty six)
I'm on my way to so much more
(Twenty six, twenty six)
All my rewards are still in store

I swear, I'll give it all 'til theres nothing more
'Cause I owe it all to my grandma so I'll justify what she suffered for
F*ck the norm, no whitewashing
There's nothing I'm conforming to
So I won't surrender my dream when she was stripped of hers in '42
And I know, I feel it
Sometimes it's hurtin' my mama's heart
So I fear lettin' her down 'cause she'll more afraid if I fall apart
While my father's keepin' me focused
Confirming that the commitment's real
My brother's sayin' don't let my race convince me that I don't fit the bill
So I hope, that I'm making 'em proud
And there ain't been a doubt, when the payment is down
I'll be shapin' a sound 'til I'm facin' a crowd
So I'm placin' a stake 'til the statement is loud
And they show me esteem, I been roamin' the scene
With the soul of my genes only sewn in the seams
I dont know what it means to be sober and clean
'Cause it throws me a rope when I'm so in between
But despite how it all turns out
Daryn's sayin' f*ck all the noise your voice needs to be heard now
So maybe all of this bullshit ain't nothing more than a fact of life
So I cant relinquish it all given everything that I've sacrificed

It's been a few years, I'm in my mid twenties
And I haven't got my dreams
But I'ma keep goin', even if y'all don't see it
'Til things become reality, yeah
(Twenty six, twenty six)
I'm on my way to so much more
(Twenty six, twenty six)
All my rewards are still in store