Pinkqueb1983 - and i don't know how to change it. Lyrics

A world forgetting by the World forgot
You know ever since we were Little I would get this feeling Like
Like I'm floating outside of my Body looking down at myself
And I hate what I see
How I'm acting
The way I sound
And I don't know how to Change it

And I just ended up and Sitting down and writing it One day
And it was perfect too Because it was the very end of This notebook
And so there was something That I was like
I tried to I think give myself That sense of closure

So I guess
Context too is that the first Day anything somewhat Romantic happened between Us
There was a thunderstorm Going on
And it was just like we were Just sitting there like just Watching it like

I know i was very
Yeah we were just sitting There on his porch or inside
And just watching the Thunderstorm come in
And yeah so that was

So yeah giving that context
You were a summer Thunderstorm on my drought Of golden sunshine days
Your rain and light show Made me dance in ways I'd Never had before
And oh how glorious it was

But it wasn't until you left and I looked at the fires burning at My wildflowers
That I understood that you Were not the right storm for me although
And then I was like oh but Maybe instead
So I put a half of a parenthesis Here expecting me to finish it Off and be like

Oh I could replace this Instead of this because this is How my brain edits as I'm Writing
But I never closed this Parenthesis and kind of went From here
So this is why I'm explaining Why it doesn't make sense
Your rain did not quench my Thirst but oh how I danced

Swaying and leaping in new Ways I never thought possible
Drenched and with my eyes And arms turned towards the Sky
I begged for more of the light Show and beat and bone-Shaking beat
That were distracting me from The fires scorching my Already parched wildflowers

It wasn't until you left with Me chasing after you
That I finally looked around And felt the depth of your Destruction
And there I sat soaked to the Bone in a smoldering field of Wildflowers
Trying to water the earth and Bring them back to life

With my tears that were Locked somewhere deep Within me
As my wildflowers started to Wilt I looked around again
And I realized that I was Utterly alone
So I took my flowers in my Arms but as I touched them

They crumpled and turned Brown disappearing the more I tried to hold onto them
In desperation I finally Plucked them roots and all From the earth
I could no longer hold them
And I just ended up sitting Down and writing it one day

And it was perfect too Because it was the very end of This notebook
And so there was something That I was like
I tried to I think give myself That sense of closure

You know ever since we were Little I would get this feeling like
Like I'm floating outside of my Body looking down at myself
And I hate what I see
How I'm acting
The way I sound
And I don't know how to Change it