Everyone from across the nation
I'm gonna tell you the new sensation
A deviation
For celebration
From Tokyo to the Appalachians
It's hip
And it is my dick
Far too big to be called a prick
My dick is in
Ruth, Claire, and Kim
Makes Herman Munster look like Tiny Tim
CHORUS:
My dick
My dick
My dick
My dick
Like Zorro's Z
My dick Makes G
G is Gook and Gook is me
MC's game is makin a name
But my dick has a star on the walk of fame
It plays one on one with Magic Johnson
And beasts his ass
I say my dick's so fast it didn't have to pass
What do you do when you're dick's so huge
That John Holmes dreams of bein you
But Holmes is dead didn't use his head
This cock's gonna give a message instead
To take your time
Know your playmates don't be blind
My dick has its own zodiac sign
So I know what I say
I was born in April and my dick was born in May
CHORUS
My dick is great
It satiates
Every woman I've ever known to date
They say they've never gone that far
When I die they wanna put my dick in a jar
I refute
Not only huge, but cute
No Smithsonian Institute
For me
You have your memories
Of a size an elephant envies
But yet
Let's not forget
It's not just a measurement
It's the way it pumps
It fills ten cups
Siskel and Ebert give it two thumbs up
It's fate
I'll be there tomorrow but my dick is there today
CHORUS
Haiti!
There's a temple there
Where all the natives sit and stare
At a photocopy of my dink
That's truly righteous, don't you think?
Every schoolboy's heard the legend
Bout how my cork is girlie heaven
Body burner
Kathleen Turner
Offered me a grand to learn here
But I refused
The holy meat won't be abused
I will never come to choose
For money it will not be used
Integrity
That is the path for me
You'll come to see the life I lead
Is of uncommon loyalty
To my dick
Where it goes I'll follow it
CHORUS
(Well... but you should see it when it's hard