Puhzzl - So Cold Lyrics

Uh, so cold from things that I've been through No true home in places I've been to
So cold from things that I've seen A pallbearer way more times than I'd think I'm
So cold, got old and grew numb Grew stupid and therefore never grew up
So cold, don't know who I see When I look in the mirror, got blood on my jeans

Uh, colder than you could ever imagine Man, I saw my own mother lifted up in a casket
I got issues, I was just a kid in the back sitting alone, waiting for my f*cking dad to
Get back, like, dawg, I missed you Now I'm having panic attacks
And writing raps in my twenties 'bout the shit in my past and how I misused

Every little tool that I had Ignored it all and continued down a terrible path
Like, who am I to evade the truth? I'm just as guilty for my sins as anybody is
The difference? I display the proof. I'm always praying for forgiveness
Cause I ate the fruit Same as you, I hate the way

I always make a lame excuse Like, father, please, I promise
This will be the last Had a long day at work
I think I may deserve a glass But the fact is, I plan on having
Every little splash Then a blunt to go to sleep

But even that don't make me crash Cause I'm so cold from things that I've been
Through No true home in places I've been to
So cold from things that I've seen a pallbearer way more times than I'd think I'm
So cold, got old and grew numb Grew stupid and therefore never grew up

I'm so cold, don't know who I see When I look in the mirror, got blood on my jeans
I'm so cold, you can see it in my eyes Or, that could just be the blunt I had for
Supper With a side of disappointment in myself
Because I know I could have tried a little harder

Not to have so many people that despise me I don't blame you, I don't like me
Or any song I ever made I held 'em tightly For so long, now it's time I quit the fighting
Maybe Puhzzl dies and Johnny gives up on the writing
Like, damn, isn't this just so exciting? Another white kid who's trying to rap about

His life When I tried, no surprise
Not a single person liked it Next thing I know, I got a 100k and climbin
I said, oh, I got twenty I could release And twenty more that I could give away
And call them freebies, it's easy But if it all just keeps repeating

I'ma put it down for good And find a different way of grieving
I'm so cold from things that I've been through No true home in places I've been to
So cold from things that I've seen a pallbearer way more times than I'd think
I'm So cold, got old and grew numb

Grew stupid and therefore never grew up I'm so cold, don't know who I see
When I look in the mirror, got blood on my jeans