sadgirltown - fight (feat. 4lexf) Lyrics

Sometimes I'm sitting feeling heavy feeling not alive
Sometimes I'm thinking feeling empty brink of suicide
Often things get heavy but the pain show thru my eyes
Sometimes it's just my personality, but you don't see my eyes
When I'm alone I'm thinking what I'm doing bout my life
I think you Think you see my truth but my life's a lie
I cry I cry I cry I cry I cry every single night
I know but when I see you I see that shining light
What's the point with the pain that's going thru my life
You know I make that joke but everything's a fight
I try to be so normal but all I do is die
When I see that mirror I fall back to my burning thighs
I know you see what's wrong in the things I write
I can feel your eyes on me judging every sight
Don't think I don't know why my life's a bitch
Cuz I break my back trying not to cut my wrists
You don't know what goes on with my anxieties
Social purpose will just never be my reality
When I look at you I think of who I used to be
A kid not afraid to smile but they stole my leaf
I used to shine so bright above like the f*cking stars
Now I sit here trying to cover up all my scars
Tears soaked in long sleeves in the backseat of your car
I try to be that constellation that you really are
Bright blue green eyes, a super smile, a surprise
A picture perfect reflection of everything I try to hide
I know it might seem stupid in everyone else's eyes
But I just can't be me, cuz everything I do is a fight
What is my purpose, god, why did you put that person in my sight
A person who could smile brighter than everything alive
A little girl who smiled but people broke her down and made her cry
Why can't I be what he is, why did I lose my smile?