Tibbie-X - Deadbeat Dad (and Smoker Mom) Lyrics

You weren't there for little Johnny boy
You weren't there for Susie Q
Some people say you did a bad, bad job
But I'm oh so fond of you
So I raise my glass to you
'Cause I drank my first beer with you too
Here's to Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
Bowing out the bleachers at the soccer game
You were too drunk to know your own kid's name
Took yourself a ice cream to buy your love
You were my acid wash angel from up above
The empty Thomas at the waterpark
The unpaid bills left you in the dark
Santa's help us all so we could keep the change
Running past the dogs in front of me
So I raise my glass to you
'Cause I drank my first beer with you too
Here's to Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
Dad's been on the couch all day
Yelling that the TV's gay
He takes your brother to the strip bar
Or his future mom in his car
McDonald's, food stamps and welfare
Cowboy boots, wagon wire, four-seat bed, oh yeah
So I raise my glass to you
'Cause I drank my first beer with you too
Here's to Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
Oh my god, this one time I smoked pot
With my friend's mom in the basement
And she got me W-A-S-T-E-D wasted
Don't get jealous, cause then my friend came home
And she freaked out and we couldn't hang out anymore
But I got a new best friend that day
And she let me drive her car in a tube top!
So I raise my glass to you
'Cause I drank my first beer with you too
Here's to Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
You goddamn f*cking rule!
Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
In the goddamn f*cking pool!
Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
You goddamn f*cking rule
Deadbeat Dad and Smoker Mom
You goddamn f*cking rule!