The Trauma Box - i was falling down Lyrics

I was falling down
I was throwing up
I was stumbling drunk
Through a suffocating fog
No semblance of myself
Or who i thought i was
Just a shadow of a boy
Who never should've grown up
I was quiet like you wanted
I didn't say a word
When my truth was too painful
You just wanted to be reassured
There are still some words i won't write
Of my head and longing heart
Questions i won't invite
Answers too hard
It's better to stay silent
Than get you lost in my thoughts
All your life you've been special
How could i think that would change
All my words turn resentful
Too old now for anger
There's no point in redemption
If you can never be happy
Can you ever be happy
Can you ever be happy
Can you ever be happy
Will you ever be happy