Dear Lord
I come to you as humble as I can just a humble man
Not trying to overstep, but hoping you understand
I don't know if my heart is healed or if I'm still hurting
I don't know if I'm a great man or a bad person
Sometimes I feel worthless, feel like I lack purpose
Running from a black serpent, got my calves hurting
Some things you've written we don't understand, like bad cursive
I know you seeing these wack churches, all cash worship
But that aint the reason I aint been to church
I battle my demons even when it hurts
And what I believe is since a kid at birth
You want us to weaken all the sin on earth
I feel like you got good intentions
But some things have happened I'm not about to mention
Just bring on the rapture and stop all your children
From pulling and blasting and cops trying to kill us
I'm sorry
Just emotional and stressed
On a road don't know what's next
But I guess you supposed to know what's best
Just hope you show me next
Cause I'm pressed and my soul will know no rest
Til I flex and explode my freaking chest
Both pecs 'til the throne is shown for rest
And I do know that I don't deserve your grace
But I just hope that you keep my family safe
And I do know that I don't deserve your grace
But I just hope that you keep my family safe
Cause I don't know what to expect anymore
Feel like you don't try to protect anymore
Not sure what you keep trying to lecture me for
I'm better off dead in my sin but I shedded my skin
What you keep resurrecting me for
Honestly don't know what I was sent for
Blessed with a gift and I try to give more
Got to be a husband a son and a mentor
Half man half beast, centaur
Feel pain from the pressure you give
Feeling like you get pleasure from this
Does it really get better than this
I just feel like I never can win
Puzzled my mind is racing it's stuck and I'm contemplating
I jump between God and Satan I stumble and I'm embracing
The struggle I jot on pages I'm troubled I try to fake it
Cause some people watch I hate it I run but I got to face it
I'm sorry
In Jesus name, Amen