I'll teach you how to design a fulfilling partner
Download an app or step outside to start her
Take the bare stump you've been praying to engrave
Put on leather gloves and push it slowly through the lathe
Take your food processor out to the playgrounds
Make sure to stand still while you're twirling it around
Jump on... from a high post
And swipe a quick ride from the bike you like the most
Scream, "I love road trips," and tell them all what you've done
The fathers will seem worried and go collect all their sons
You'll wake up in the shed drinking algae from a hose
With fourteen worthless notifications about your nose
You did the best that you could do
You did the best that you could do
There's a reason you can't easily walk on wood chips
The chips are made from tar and the bars, recycled ships
Now you're climbing to feed the birds, you're skinning your own chip
But it's time for the twenty-four point sanding to begin
Scream, "I love road trips," and tell them all what you've done
The fathers will seem worried and go collect all their sons
You'll wake up in the shed drinking algae from a hose
With fifteen worthless notifications about your nose
You both did the best that you could do
You both did the best that you could do