Over 100 overrated bands not having fun
8 different stages that we'll never play on
Over 500 hours that we won't get spun
40 something dates and we won't even make one
'Cause
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
We got bills to pay
Bands, concession stands loosen their clamp
Juvenile, family day mothers dressed like tramps
We're not invited and we'll take it like a champ
'Cause it's a dirty hill, f*ck filled, trust fund summer camp
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old to play Every year
$12 beer
Cervical smear
F*cking haggard gear
Evening prayer
Pubic hair
Puppeteer
Multimillionaire
Delusions of grandeur
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
We're too old for warped tour
I can't afford the buy-in
I can't afford the merch rate
We're too old for warped tour
F*ck you, I got bills to pay