XDead_ManX - Hate Myself Lyrics

I've been running, running from the person in the mirror
Can't stand the sight of him, his face keeps getting clearer
Try to drown the noise, but it's loud in my head
Wish I could change the channel, but the pain's all I get

I wanna help, yeah, but I'm falling apart
Every time I reach for hope, it rips me apart
The scars on my soul, yeah, they're deeper than skin
Wanna break the cycle, but I don't know where to begin

I'm tired of the fight, tired of the wait
Looking for an exit, but I'm running out of faith
Tell me where's the light, where's the hand that'll save
Feels like I'm digging my own grave

I hate myself, can't you see it in my eyes
I'm trying to believe, but I'm buried under lies
I wanna change, yeah, I wanna break free
But it's hard to win a war when the enemy's me

I hate myself, but I'm screaming for help
How can I lift him up when I'm losing myself
I'm waiting on the day when the sun finally shines
But I'm stuck in the storm and I'm running out of time

I talk to God, but the silence is loud
Begging for a sign, but I'm lost in the crowd
I thought by now I'd be somewhere better
But every step forward just tightens the fetter

I see the way out, but it's harder to walk
The weight on my shoulders, yeah, it's cutting me off
Tryna breathe, but the air's too thin
How do I fight back when I'm caged within

I'm tired of pretending, tired of the pain
Feels like I'm drowning, can't escape the rain
I'm waiting for the day when I can finally see
That maybe there's a way to set myself free

I hate myself, can't you see it in my eyes
I'm trying to believe, but I'm buried under lies
I wanna change, yeah, I wanna break free
But it's harder in a war when the enemies need

I hate myself, but I'm screaming for help
How can I lift him up when I'm losing myself
I'm waiting on the day when the sun finally shines
But I'm stuck in the storm and I'm running out of time

Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be enough
Or if I'm cursed to always feel this rough
I wanna hope, but I'm afraid to believe
That maybe one day I'll finally be free

I wanna see the light, but it's fading away
I'm holding on to hope, but it's slipping today
Maybe tomorrow, maybe someday soon
I'll find a way out of this empty room

But right now, I'm stuck in the dark
With a heart that's heavy and a soul full of scars
I keep praying for change, but it's out of my hands
Still I hold on, cause I want to understand

But maybe it'll never end
But maybe it'll never end